SYRIAN PERSPECTIVE BUYS MEDIA GIANT "MERCURY NEWS LTD"

August 24, 2011 – SyrianPerspective, the leading Syrian blogsite and disseminator of accurate news concerning the Near East, has purchased, for an undisclosed sum, the entire “MERCURY NEWS LTD” company.  Ziad Abu Fadel, the lawyer, academic, translator, wag, pundit and gadfly, has promised that the news service will be “even more dishonest than the New York Times”.  He contininued to say:  “We have reporters who received the highest grades in creative writing classes.  Our journalists can invent sources and quotes faster than the slink of a cat  We insist on hard-drinking journalism”.  Despite efforts by the BBC and Canadian Broadcasting to purchase the Mercury operation before SyrianPerspective could get its “oily” hands on it,  Abu-Fadel came up with the unfettered cash offer backed by the BANQUE LEVANTE of TARABLUS.  BBC chairman Sir Seamus Orde-Tancred-Wankblum,  remarked that Mercury “threatens all that we hold dear”.