RUSSIAN FLEET MAY CONTAIN TWO AIRCRAFT CARRIERS;

November 21, 2011 – My friend Ali, who diligently watches the news and reads about new developments with the industriousness of a North American beaver has told me that the Russian fleet will be accompanied by two aircraft carriers.  This has not been confirmed and my sources in Latakia say that only battle cruisers have been visually spotted so far.  In any case, the BBC has not picked up on this, naturally, because the twerps in their staff won’t know what to make of all this without the instruction of their MI6 spin doctors. I will be following events today and will inform you accordingly. 

The BBC’s Jim Muir, besotted on Lebanese Arak, could only report today that some Syrian troops fired on a busload of Turkish pilgrims returning to Turkey.  Somewhere in Central Syria, the bus came to a stop and identified itself.  Supposedly, according to Muir, who is not reliable since he is not on the scene, the Syrian soldiers hurled curses at SULTAN RECEP ERDOGHAN THE CRUMB, and fired some shots at the bus.  No one was hurt.  Muir does state, without any basis, that the “violence continued in Syria”.  Amazingly, our relatives told us over the weekend that they heard of very little violence with Homs being completely pacified and happy.  I’ll be reporting to you shortly.