Saraaqeb: Big battle around a culvert surrounded by SAA and militia. 8 rodents killed. No survivors. According to Wael, there were 2 Chechens in the group.
North Abu Dhuhoor Airbase: No luck for the luckless FSA. Confirmed 2 rats killed with some wounded in the distance.
Ma’rratmassreen: Continuous fighting here as rats refuse to give up their hold on this axis-point. But there are few left as reinforcements cannot break through. 3 killed. No other details.
Al-Nayrab at the Ba’ath Party Youth Camp (Shabeeba, remember?): Same old story. Wael received a report that 2 rats were killed. Nobody cares.
Taftanaaz: More efforts fail to get the airbase. No details.
Sarmeen: 4 cockroaches met their fate at the hands of SAA marksmen when they tried to escape their warehouse. All 4 were identified:
Jawreen-Ishtabraq road: A rat planting an IED went “POOF!” after it prematurely exploded and sent his molecules straight to the Eternal Nebulizer in Hell. Nobody wanted to scrape up his body parts. The buzzards are having a feast.
Ishtabraq: 3 IEDs with remote control triggers were dismantled to the relief of the inhabitants.
Areehaa: 12 rats of the FSA died defending absolutely nothing. Their British handlers are pleased, no doubt:
Bizaaboor: 2 killed. No details.
Jabal Al-Arba’een: (Mountain of the Forty). Forty Thieves? Maybe. 7 killed by visual count. No details.
Binnish: Another boring airbase with fighting around it. No details.
Ma’rrat Al-Nu’maan: Almost completely rat-free in the town but remnant rodents continue to prowl around the north cemetery area. No details, but confirmed dead rats.
Dayr Sunbul: We captured an intact flatbed with Doschka machine gun cannon attached to it. Our NDF people will be so pleased. THANK YOU, PRINCE FATSO FOR THE BEAUTIFUL GIFT.
Al-Sindiyaana: 3 rodents caught stealing cheese. No details.
LATAKIA: SAUDI RAT EXCREMENT DRIES IN THE MEDITERRANEAN SUN.
Jubb Al-Ahmar: Jabhat Al-Nusra contributed more manure to fertilize our lovely orchards yesterday. And what better fertilizer than the Saudi brand?
KHALED AL-SHAAREDI (SAUDI AIDS CARRYING VERMIN)
JIHAAD AL-MAYSSER (SAUDI EBOLA CARRYING SEWER RAT)
2 Saudi rodents lie dead on the streets of Jubb Al-Ahmar after looking the Grim Reaper Brigades straight in the face. They are now lounging in the VIP room at the Cloven Hoof Hotel before their express flight to a spa on the banks of the Styx River.
DAMASCUS: BARZEH GOES UP LIKE A FIREWORKS DISPLAY ON MEMORIAL DAY!! THE LAST MAJOR WEAPONS DEPOT USED BY RODENTS IGNITED BY A PERFECT ARTILLERY SHOT.
SyrPer received word, last night, that the Syrian Army achieved a direct hit on a massive weapons depot controlled by the Jabhat Al-Nusra in rural Barzeh. The statistics have not started to come in, but Monzer and Wael confirm at least 60 dead rodents with ammunition and weapons destroyed in the millions of dollars. This is major setback for the American-sponsored mercenaries. There can be no recovery from this.
HOMS: PHASE II OF THE ATTACK ON AL-QUSAYR CONTINUING. REPORTS OF 76 RODENTS SURRENDERING.
MOROCCAN RAT LEADER WOUNDED AND CAPTURED IN AL-QUSAYR. 13 OTHER VERMIN KILLED IN HIS GROUP. NO DETAILS, YET.
Also, see this nice tape made by our hero, Hussein Mortada, the Syrian-born reporter for Al-Alam about Al-Qusayr. It’s in Arabic but the scenes are nice and informative:
THERE HAS BEEN ANOTHER MASSACRE OF CHRISTIANS IN HOMS BY THE FSA. WE WILL HAVE DETAILS TOMORROW. IT’S JUST HORRIBLE.
HAMA: At Kafr Nabboda, a missile launcher belonging to Jabhat Al-Nusra was seized along with some light weapons.
Suqaylbiyya: 6 rats arrested and are warbling.
LEBANON: At Waadi Hameed in ‘Arsaal, FSA murdered 3 Lebanese soldiers. The killers drove up in a black car and opened fire on them.
3 soldiers of the Lebanese Army were killed yesterday in Waadi Hameed, in the ‘Arsaal area, after they were ambushed by FSA criminals riding in a black car. The search is on for the perps.
JORDAN: AMMAN. MUHAMMAD AL-SHALABI “ABU SAYYAAF”, A SALAFIST LEADER CLAIMS OVER 50 OF HIS ILK HAVE BEEN KILLED IN SYRIA FIGHTING AGAINST THE LEGITIMATE GOVERNMENT. We know he is underestimating the number and that it is more like 300.
Juhaina News quoted him in Arabic:
“The FSA is in a very serious situation especially after the entry of Hizbollah’s forces which have turned the equation upside down. And what is happening now is the world pouncing on the Mujaahideen in Syria”.
NEWS AND HOT AIR FROM AROUND THE GLOBE: