Mahmoud Idrees, Salim Idrees’ unwanted illegitimate son born in a brothel, is seen here bidding farewell to our readers as a bullet goes through his nose and nests cozily in his medulla oblongata.
Here is the continuation of the list from the Syrian Army’s massive victory at Al-Ghazlaaniyya as of this morning at 4:45 a.m. EDT:
Majeed ——– (?)
‘Abdul-Naasser Al-Hamdaan (SAUDI SCARABIAN HEMORRHOID)
Shaaf’i Madfoon (Buried he is, indeed)
Monzer says that there are over 250 bodies which cannot be identifed as the process continues and carasses are removed for public health reasons. This is quite a mess.
Jawbar: In a firefight with militia this one was confirmed:
Mahmoud Idrees (See photo at top)
Barza: A tunnel dug by Jabhat Al-Nusra was uncovered with 7 dead foreigners in it. The exact way the carcasses were found is not clear according to Monzer. He believes they were all Jordanians.
Al-Bihaariyya Farms: SAA found and killed these muskrats:
Al-Hujjayra: A unit of militia fought it out with a J.N. pack of rats and killed this Iraqi:
Baaqer Hayman (IRAQI FECAL WEED BLOSSOM)
Hassan Al-Hassan and Mu’tassem Al-Hassan, 2 Lebanese brothers who epitomized the kind of stupidity despised by any rational god, managed to blow themselves up in a botched suicide operation. So sad. They now both join the Deeb brothers from Sweden. They are seen above snorting Matta from Argentina.
Al-Hissin Citadel: This is where the delightful brother team of Hassan and Mu’tassem went straight to Hell. Apparently, they were not satisfied with the 2-brother act and decided to take some others along with them on the lonely trip to Charon’s humble boat:
Mu’tassem Al-Hassan (a/k/a Abu Mu’aadh. LEBANTEEZ SNAIL VOMIT)
Hassan Al-Hassan (LEBANTEEZ WORM SLIME)
Also at Al-Hissin, a suicide bomber’s attempt to blow himself up in a residential area met with some difficulty when adroit infantryment spotted the van and blew it up before it arrived at its planned destination. The driver was molecularized by the blast and cannot be identified except as “Mr. Bodyparts”.
Talbeesa: The FSA, desperate for some claim to victory, attacked an old folks hospice east of the town with a 23mm machine gun mounted on a flatbed truck but wound up losing the gun and the truck to alert police and security agents who unleashed a torrent of lead on the Islamist retards and killed:
Baab Hood: I am surprised this quarter has not been purified and deliced yet. I am becoming impatient. According to SANA, there was some fighting there yesterday but no details.
Old Al-Wa’er in the north of Homs, fighting but no details. Wael says he received this note about one confirmed carcass:
Mahmoud Hussayn Shahbar
Employees Pharmacy: Fighting with no details.
Jawrat Al-Shiyyaah: Soon to be declared rat-free. At the Shari’ah School, these rodents took the lunch pass to Old Scratch’s Pub and Grill never to return:
Al-Qaraabees: In the Ghouta, the SAA destroyed a tunnel at the Al-Tawfeeq Mosque, 4 confirmed carcasses but no id.
Al-Zaara: 5 rodents got on the endless carousel ride in Erebus and will slowly roast for another google years. No details.
DER’AH: Western media is trying to portray the south as “up for grabs”. It’s just not true. There is little fighting because there are fewer rats to kill, for now, anyways.
Al-Haara: 12 rodents followed the mole to Belial’s favorite rest stop in Hades and got skewered:
The rest did not have valid documents and are presumed foreign.
In the city, yesterday, the rats tried to infiltrate past a security detail and failed. All 6 were killed. No details.
HAMA: Solidly in the hands of the SAA, this province does not see much action. Here’s what I have received:
Al-Sa’en: In rural Idlib. With the help of citizens sick of rodent infestation, the SAA and security were able to kill 9 rats in 2 vehicles, one a 4-wheel drive Toyota truck and the other a Mitsubishi van. In the ensuing ambush laid by the SAA, a confirmed 7 rats were killed and 2 wounded seriously. All belonged to “Al-Faarooq Brigades” (yawn). SAA seized also hundreds of assault rifle magazines which will be useful in killing Saudi Scarabian apes when the time is right.
Al-Hardaana and Abu-Hubaylaat: In the Al-Salamiyya rural area east of the city. Weapons were seized but I have no details.
LEBANON: BEIRUT: SYRIAN AMBASSADOR, ‘ABDUL-KAREEM ‘ALI, ANNOUNCES NUMEROUS CONTACTS WITH DISAFFECTED FSA OFFICERS OFFERING TO RETURN TO DUTY AND FIGHT FOREIGN EXTREMIST RATS.
Well, the Lebs wanted full diplomatic relations with Syria to reinforce their belief that the two countries were separate. Ambassador ‘Ali is now proof of that.
He told Lebanese newspapers yesterday that he received many calls from disgruntled Syrian deserters, some officers, who want to get their jobs back to “fight the foreign terrorist extremists”. We hope the MoD deals with this judiciously and prudently. We don’t like the smell of it. ZAF
IDLIB: Heavy fighting going on with figures hard to collect because of the nature of the terrain and proliferation of snipers. Fighting is confirmed in these areas:
Ma’arratmassreen: Liberated but still under attack by disappointed rodents.
Tal Al-Sultaan west of the Abu-Dhuhoor Airbase
Areeha: SAA killed 8 highwaymen belonging to the Jabhat Al-Nusra
Saraaqeb: A nest of rats was destroyed. (SANA)
Al-Mastooma: 2 IEDs (each 50kgs) about to be synchronously detonated were foiled and the vermin operators killed. No details.
LATAKIA: They just don’t get it. Same areas and same results: DEATH for the rats.
Al-Rubay’ah: An area so filled with decaying corpses that it should be declared a quarantined zone. I have no details about the confirmed 18 rodents killed by our snipers and marksmen yesterday as they tried to infiltrate from Hatay, Turkish-Occupied Syria.
Khaan Al-Jawz: 6 Chechens were killed here. How does Wael know they are Chechens? Because they could be heard shouting to one another in Chechen. That’s how. No identification on these carcasses. No one cares about where they are cremated.
Jabal Al-Kooz: All foreign rodent terrorist mercenaries here. No one was Syrian. All were J.N. We have 2 Libyans confirmed out of the 14 killed:
‘Ubaada Muhammad Nafoosi (LIBYAN APE VOMITUS)
‘Aamer ‘Abdul-Ghani Jadeeri (LIBYAN APE INTESTINAL SECRETIONS)
Kinsibba: Also on the Turkish border, Jabhat Al-Nusra was cornered and killed to the tune of 6 rats. The other litter-mates crept back to Turkey. No details.
Al-Reehaaniyya: No details about fighting there.
Saaqiyat Al-Kirt: No details about fighting there.
Al-Yanaabee’ Area: (SANA) A big cache of weapons is seized and a Libyan is killed.
‘Abdul-Rahmaan Al-Taraabulusi (LIBYAN APE TOE NAIL)
Tal ‘Aran: An attack on civilians unwilling to tolerate his rats has resulted in a massacre ordered by none other than ‘Abdul-Jabbaar Al-Ukaydi of the FSA. It’s being investigated now. Bad show.
Tal Haassel: FSA attack foiled. No body count.
Bustaan Al-Baasha in the city, a Jabhat Al-Nusra field commander is killed:
“Abu-Suhayb Al-Shishaani” (CHECHEN DUNG BEETLE. Id pending)
Al-Halabi Farms near Nibbul north of ‘Anadaan cleared and safe to repopulate. An attack by J.N. savages yesterday on Nibbul was repelled by militia and Lebanese fighters.
SOME NEWS AND PROPAGANDA:
Here’s an article that will reassure Archbishop Luqa Al-Khouri who visited Detroit on Friday for the Syrian American Forum’s Ramadan Dinner which was also attended by Bashar Al-Ja’fari:
More laughs for the cynical amongst you: