SEX JIHAD CALIPHATE DECLARED IN IRAQ AND SYRIA

Abu Bakr Al-Baghdaadi, seen here in his natural turban, is now the new Caliph of Kaka.  Hosannah in the Highest!

Just when you thought the Age of Reason was going to make a comeback, the American-controlled Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) has formally declared the establishment of a Caliphate in areas it thinks it controls in both countries.  As a warm-up to the ascension of Abu Bakr Al-Baghdaadi to the throne, ISIS commanders in Mosul have issued a new “fatwa” forcing women to cough up $30,000.00 (I kid you not) if they want to avoid having sex with the smelly, rotten, slimy, stinking,  hogs who make up the American-supported Al-Qaeda off-shoot called ISIS.  And, even more menacing, their families will have to pay 180,000 Iraqi Dinars if they choose not to announce their fealty to the great new child molesting Caliph of Kaka, Abu Bakr Al-Baghdaadi.

If you are like Ziad, you are probably guffawing now, almost regurgitating the eggs and sausage you downed before opening up your P.C. to this site.  BUT NOW, IT GETS ACTUALLY BETTER!!

First of all, we cannot forget that the rodents in Al-Raqqa, the only major city in Syria under the exclusive control of ISIS, have emerged to the Sounds of Silence to announce their approval after hearing the announcement of the new Caliphate of Squat.  Reports coming in indicate a few convoys of stolen vehicles blaring their horns to the scene of empty balconies and verandas testifying to the great popularity of the GREAT PEDOPHILE OF MOSUL.

Now try to hold down your breakfasts:  IRAN HAS ANNOUNCED THAT IT HAS COME TO AN AGREEMENT WITH QATAR (of all countries) TO COOPERATE IN THE WAR AGAINST TERRORISM!  Now, I told you that you should brace yourself and have a airline sickness bag next to you.  Or maybe, you’d better stay close to the old Water Closet, just in case your body does more than reject the contents in your stomach.  What are the Iranians doing?….. for Pete’s sake?

BUT IT GETS EVEN MORE HILARIOUS:

American agents, Nabil Al-Arabi, the capo di tutti capi of the Arab League,  and Iyaad Maydaani, who heads the Organization of Islamic Cooperation, have called on all parties in Syria to lay down their arms during the Holy Month of Ramadhaan.  (Please, stop salivating, foaming at the mouth or barfing.)  That’s right, friends, they want to give their favorite American-supported rodents a one month lease on life so they can get some nourishment to fight on.

SYRIAN PERSPECTIVE PROMISES ALL ITS READERS THAT THE SYRIAN ARMY WILL NOT FALL FOR THIS RUSE AND SHALL CONTINUE ITS HOLY WAR TO ERADICATE THE FILTH, MICROBES AND SEWER DENIZENS TRAINED, PAID FOR AND SUPPORTED BY THAT CHICAGO GUTTER RAT, OBAMA.  HOORAY FOR HYPOCRISY!

BUT NOW, THE ULTIMATE:  THE MERCURY NEWS SERVICE (“Don’t let the facts get in the way of a good story”), has announced that former U.S. president, William Blythe (a/k/a Bill Clinton) has been appointed by Abu Bakr Al-Baghdaadi to the post of Minister of Monkey Business.  We look forward to hard work by the new appointee and send our congratulations to both him and his lovely wife, Hillary.

Minister of Monkey Business Designate, William Clinton, sizes up Liz Hurley (n/k/a Khadeeja Abu-Hummus) for hard work in promoting the agenda of ISIS.  Sorry, Hugh.  Stick with the goons in Los Angeles. (Photo: World Tribune)

ZAF

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Paul S.
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Paul S.

Poor Bill Clinton. He has to wake up every morning and see that awful, angry mess in a pants suit – cankles and all. I’d rather be Bashar living in a war zone, at least he’s got Asma.

pansexual cigars
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pansexual cigars

Bill Clinton ‘secret White House trysts with Liz Hurley’ as wife Hillary slept in the next room

Feb 05, 2014 14:57
By Lucy Buckland, Christopher Bucktin

Astonishing claims the former US President had a year long affair with the British actress – which begun after he flew her to the White House

http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/bill-clinton-sex-liz-hurley-3114269#ixzz368Gyyb00

Pat
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Pat
This is all about splitting up Iraq to make it weak and to steal their oil. Kurds will sell their oil cheap to Israel. US and UK will try to get another third of Iraq. It is always about stealing oil, any gold that a country owns or running drugs, prostitutes, etc. These endless wars are all about creating chaos. Hundreds of years of the banksters and oligarchs getting Christian boys in Europe killing each other (WW1 and 2). In the Middle East, get young Sunni and Shia men killing each other. Ukriane get young Roman Catholic Christains kill Orthodox… Read more »
david
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Level 5 - Tribunus Militum

iran like russia is either naive, stupid or complicit in events in iraq and syria. how can iran be allys with qatar in regard to fighting terror? it defies logic and reason. iran is begging to be taken down it appears. and so is russia with its limp wristed efforts in the ukraine. one day when they have been defeated militarily and economically they will think back at their actions here. and they will realise they were weak and not too bright.

Anonymous
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Anonymous

iranians are smart. if they (pretend to) work together with qatar, it will certainly work to their advantage somehow.

Canthama
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Canthama
David, I agree, I am struggling lately with how cloudy is the Iranian behavior in the Iraq event, though I understand they are helping to train, organize and build up a shia militia or a NDF type group in Iraq, they flirt and is not assertive with the Kurds, the latter is under a non aggression deal with ISIS in Mosul and clearly stealing what they can from Iraq at the moment, weapons, oil etc… Now Iran is giving ears to Qatar, a major supporter of all sort of bad rats in Syria and ISIS in Iraq, what the hell… Read more »
Nini
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david just chill man, The Iranian are not stupid.They have survived this long with Shit sanctions and on top of that Israelis wanting to attack them every other day!
If Iran joins forces with Qatar its one way of get back to the Saudi’s and causing divisions . Remember the fucking GCC arabs just hate each other!

spinworthy
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spinworthy

David, think of the bigger picture
– Qatar is a gas producer, Iran is a gas producer and Russia is a gas producer.
Looks like the Syria/Iraq gambit to sabotage the transit corridor is taking a more interesting turn!. There’s more than meets the eye here, and the ‘settlers’ have a stake in the gas game as well.

Pat
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Pat

I wonder is Qatar has seen that the game is changing and that they don’t want to be against the side tast appears to be winning. If Iraq can get their act together and get rid of ISIS along with Syria. If Iran, Iraq and Syria can get with Russia and realize that these Sunni-Shia wars are creted by the West then things will change rapidly.

Syria the Unstoppable Juggernaut
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Syria the Unstoppable Juggernaut
SaveIraqSyria
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SaveIraqSyria

So those who chose to stay in Mosul (and Aleppo) didn’t make it easier for the army. They should have left but now that they are there, they should fight back to save their women and daughters… kill at least one of those rats before you die. ( with a knife or a byte in the neck ) Here in the US a lot of people are armed and expecting this anarchy to happen one day…

Mentat
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Mentat
Well, it looks like the ‘Birth Pangs of a new Middle East’ are finally starting to bear their natural fruit, though not quite those which the bloodthirsty Yankee oil-thieves had envisioned when coining the phrase to cover their serial warcrimes in the region. Instead of an expanse of broken House-Arabs quietly pumping oil under the perpetual petrodollar diktat of Washington, yesterday was born alive and kicking the brand-new Islamic State, or Caliphate, with its freshly minted Caliph, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, who has unapologetically fused the spirit of Bin Laden with the sinews of his own expeditionary guerrilla army. But this… Read more »
R
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R

MENTAT–Finally an encompassing post and very accurate.No French/British lines in the sand.

“At peril in the longer term, if it succeeds, are the existing hegemonies of USA/Israel/Saudi over the Middle East.” Well put.

going back to cali
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going back to cali

You wankers are smelling each other’s farts and toasting again!
We’ve had to endure mantit’s imbecile rage regarding Ziad promoting fantasies while he reads excerpts from the ‘califate’s’ press pack.
Get a real job.

Mentat
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Mentat
Harsh reality has long is overtaken Ziad’s poor attempts, as seen above, to trivialize it. Particularly cheap and ludicrous is his politically pathological attempt to paint the IS as a pawn of the dumb Yankee thieves. He has obviously led a somewhat sheltered existence, probably never having seen the original series of ISI resistance videos from Iraq, wherein the cameramen used to regularly weep with authentic tears of joy whenever a perfectly-timed IED would blast another Hummer’ful of gutless GameBoy Yanks into a richly deserved stratospheric oblivion. The man who set it up, Zarqawi, was certainly a man with his… Read more »
going back to cali
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going back to cali

Mantit your efforts at conveying (in)sincere indignation are truly laughable.
People of this caliber? I guess they’re so righteous that they’ll take money from anyone.
Weren’t you trying to paint ISIS as allied with Assad a couple weeks ago?
I can’t stop laughing!
Cali-Fake

Mentat
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Mentat
You are supplying the emotion. There is no indignation from me, just consideration of documented facts Ziad prefers to air-brush out of history. Calibre, yes, and pedigree also. My point is not about their ‘righteousness’ or lack thereof, or source of funding, but that from inception they have always had a crystal clear idea of who their greatest enemy is, namely oil-thief USA, and have never neglected any opportunity to vaporise its filthy occupation troops with genuine, open glee. Do you really think the CIA was directing and paying Zarqawi to blow their warcriminal invading asses out of Iraq? LOL,… Read more »
R
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R
ZIAD–enjoyable thread!!!! I believe you would have had a successful career as a writer-with your incredible knowledge and your linguistics.Do you have a ghost writer to help you? :))-incredible stuff. Perhaps ,after your book or synopsis on this chapter in Syria’s existence is mandatory reading in all Syrian schools,you can turn your attention to SNL or perhaps a broad way show. Where do you get all these pictures/photos? Some are so classic.That Clinton one–if you have Hil-liar-ys email-send that to her–That is one look he never gave her. As far as—( Al-Raqqa, the only major city in Syria under the… Read more »
Captain_Must
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Captain_Must

Well, it’s ISIS now IS…..watch till the end or skip to the last 2 minutes….

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=263_1404056838

Super Jihadist….just it’s actually the miniaturized version…..

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=21c_1404057368

Joe Kuku
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Level 2 - Veteran
The iranians know what they are doing … Trust them . They are great chess players like the russians . This “sunni vers ” shia” fight has to be avoided at all costs and thats what Iran is doing . Its a weak link that the Zionists are exploiting . the Muslims are too stupid to realise it . Qatar is mostly sunni …Iran is playing it smart … The saudis are to be isolated in this ..they are the main rascals .A sunni/ shia conflict could kill millions! Itl go on for 20 years .Throw out all this garbage… Read more »
Tom
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Tom

Qatar should not be forgiven for its role in the destruction of Libya. I hope they too receive just punishment.

CHEVI789
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Level 7 - Tribunus Angusticlavius

The Iranians are keeping their enemies closer by the looks of it, they have a plan and i pray it works.

Mentat
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Mentat

They had a ‘plan’ in Libya too, which consisted of cheering on NATO’s destruction of the country. There’s no doubt that one worked out brilliantly! It took the fuckwits only about a year of weapons transfers through Turkey and Lebanon to stop cheering and start wondering who could possibly be attacking our harmless and faithful chum[p], Mr Assad?

American of Syrian Descent
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American of Syrian Descent
This conflict in Syria is all over it’s association with Iran. The Gulf Arabs are jealous of Iran. Israel is frustrated and fearful of their role with Hezbollah and Hamas. And America and the west are fearful of a technologically developing Iran that is the third biggest state sponsor of terrorism- behind the US and KSA. (this would shock most Americans but Afghanistan in the 1980’s was no fluke) In the 2000s decade, Iran’s influence increased for two reasons: 1) US warmongering democratization of Iraq created another Iran friendly country when the Shiite majority came to power. 2) The constant… Read more »
Majid Zarif
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Majid Zarif
Hi I can’t understand this paragraph: “Now try to hold down your breakfasts: IRAN HAS ANNOUNCED THAT IT HAS COME TO AN AGREEMENT WITH QATAR (of all countries) TO COOPERATE IN THE WAR AGAINST TERRORISM! Now, I told you that you should brace yourself and have a airline sickness bag next to you. Or maybe, you’d better stay close to the old Water Closet, just in case your body does more than reject the contents in your stomach. What are the Iranians doing?….. for Pete’s sake?” Iranian’s loyalty to syria was proved by this 3 years of syria civil war… Read more »