Al-‘Aaliya Farms: Zahraan ‘Alloosh is so desperate, he has begun ordering his rats to fight suicidal battles to hold territory. In the area where he is hiding, the SAA assaulted a warehouse filled with weapons belonging to his soon-to-be-extinct rodent organization and killed these after they were ordered by cellphone to resist any surrender. The voice on the phone was ‘Alloosh’s:
Haamid Al-Habooni (LIBYAN FECAL WEED EXTRACT)
‘Abdul-Qayyoom Sharraadi (EGYPTIAN COBRA EXCREMENT)
Another 3 could not be identified.
Hizrima Town: The SAAF killed a confirmed 18 rodents belonging to the Kataa`ib Al-Hudaa (Brigade of the Guiding Light, yawn). No names sent yet.
Tal Kurdi: 17 vultures bite the dust after a disastrously incompetent attack on SAA outposts mostly in Hawsh Al-Faarra which was recently deloused by the SAA. The buzzards belonged to Jaysh Al-Islam and Jaysh Al-Umma. Another miserable performance by Saudi queer and freak, Zahraan ‘Alloosh:
‘Ali Hussayn ‘Eedaani
No others were named.
Mayda’ah: SAA artillery struck a van carrying rats and weapons. It was a direct hit which caused the vehicle to explode atomizing the vermin inside. The body were strewn everywhere and it was hard to tell how many of the filth were inside although our source mentions 6 carcasses. No names available in this Nusra disaster.
Jawbar: See our new armored tank clearing equipment in action here: (Thanks, Gmail)
Jawbar: At the Fuel Distribution Company, a large number of crawling cockroaches were sent to the Mephistopheles Entomological Institute in Hell yesterday. Behind the New Damascus Fuel Station close to Harastaa, numerous remotely triggered IEDs were dismantled.
Zibdeen Farms: The group calling itself Liwaa` Ummahaat Al-Mu`mineen (yawn) went up in smoke last night when a perfectly executed operation pinned them down in an open field where our soldiers put them to death with superb night-time accuracy:
Jihaad ‘Abdul-Salaam Jum’ah
Maazin Muhammad Zaydaan
No other details available.
Zibdeen Farms: URGENT: Just in, the SAA has just liberated 11 blocks of buildings and farms in the east of Jawbar. Major advance seen here in the last hour.
Doumaa City: Major advance by SAA near the Al-Noor Clinic as ‘Alloosh cringes inside his little cocoon. A mortar was destroyed and a respectable number of light weapons and ammunition were seized and distributed to the NDF for use in killing child molesting heretic Wahhabists:
Yaassen Abu ‘Aysha
Baalaa Town: Major SAA advance reported. New tactics deliver results. URGENT: This just in from Damascus: Baalaa has been liberated from the direction of Hutaytat Al-Jarsh. More details tomorrow.
Western Mountains in Zabadaani: NDF surrounded and killed 5 dung beetles:
Naasser Haashim (JORDANIAN MANURE FLY LARVA)
No other names.
Fighting in the Qalamoon going our way: Al-Mushrifa, Ra`s Al-Ma’arra, Khirbat Daawood, Qaarra.
Talfeetaa at Waadi Al-Kadhdhaab: 7 confirmed rat deaths:
Abu Ra’ad (Id pending)
No other names.
Note to readers: I will be interview by a Japanese English language station on Sunday at 8:00 a.m. DST (Michigan).
Also, I will try to answer all readers’ comments tomorrow. It’s not easy when we are getting so much wonderful input from readers and so many emails. I will do my best with your understanding. ZAF